Saturday, April 30, 2016

STATurday: Pre 21 Day Fix Extreme Round 1

I am completely stocked over my results this week.  This was my week to play around until our new programs came in, so I wasn't really expecting to have lots of results.  However, I lost FIVE POUNDS!!  That's amazing to me.  I haven't been this weight since the beginning of February.  While I am not particularly proud of that, I am glad that I am beginning to get my life on track and make effective decisions for my current and future self.  It also makes me want to keep going.

I have started a new book by J.D Roth, the creator of The Biggest Loser and Extreme Weight Loss.  He discussed the concept of having a window and a mirror.  The window is for you to dream from, to figure out what you want from this life and to go after it.  The mirror is for you to take an honest, hard look at who you are now.  This is why he has the contestants weigh in with the shirt off.  He suggests to take a picture and use it as motivation.  This is not a shaming tactic, but something to be used as motivation, to remember that unhappy person and commit to never going back there again because you are better than that...I am better than that.

Since this is my (kind of) official before stats as I start 21 Day Fix Extreme tomorrow, what better way to commit to myself than by posting my "before" pictures.  They're not pretty, and I'm embarrassed by them.  I created this blog to have a safe place to talk about my fitness journey and deal with the food, the workouts, and the emotional stuff because I don't want to share this with my extended family and friends.  My wife is incredibly supportive, and I have a friend I talk to about it occasionally; however, weight has been a sensitive subject in my family my whole life.  It is one of those things we just don't talk about.  So, here it is...for the world to look at and find:

Weight: 253.8 pounds
Body Fat: 49.6%
Bust: 45 inches
Waist: 40 inches
Hips: 53 inches
Thigh: 29 inches
Arm: 15.5 inches

It can only get better from here, right?

Thursday, April 28, 2016

Workout Wednesday: Losing the Insanity and Going Extreme

Good Evening!

I know this post is coming later than usual, but at least it's here.   I was going to post this ON Wednesday, but my internet wasn't working...

First and foremost, I have been working out consistently for about a week now, and I feel SO MUCH BETTER!  It's amazing how getting some exercise can improve my mental clarity, stress level, energy level, and overall functioning.  It definitely makes me sad to think it took me so long for me to get in order and start to take care of myself the way I deserve to be taken care of (and in a way no one but me can take care of me).  I noticed the effects almost immediately.  It took a couple of days, but I definitely notice it.  I hope that I don't go back to the place I was.

Speaking of working out, Insanity Max 30 wasn't working.  I couldn't do a lot of it, and I would get discouraged.  So, I stopped.  The problem with this is it came with a slew of negative self talk.  I was a quitter, I was a for slob who has ruined her body...yeah, I'm not very nice to myself sometimes.  However, I realized that I need to meet myself where I am at, and I am not yet ready to do Insanity max 30.

I convinced my wife to use some Amazon credit we have and purchase 21 Day Fix Extreme and Focus T25.  I researched these programs and found out they were still challenging, but were more doable than Max 30.  I have done Focus T25 before and gotten awesome results, and I have heard amazing things about Autumn and the 21 Day Fix.  While I was waiting for these programs to arrive, I Cized it up and did some Zumba!

I LOVE Cize!!  It is so much fun, and you never know that you are exercising.  However, this workout was much more difficult than I remember.  This was the first day I woke up at 5am to workout, and I took a small break in the middle just to sit on the floor I was so tired.  It was awful, but I got through it.  Seriously, this is one of my favorite programs, and if I didn't believe so much in strength training I would do this all of the time.

Tuesday, I found a 20 minute Zumba DVD.  It was hard because it moved fast, and I hadn't done these moves/anything from this program before.  However, I took as many steps and burned almost as many calories as Cize, so I know I was doing something.  The worst feeling is feeling like you're watching a workout DVD because you have no idea what's going on.  But, it was fun and I'm excited to explore more of the DVDs when I have the time.

Today, I did Pilates Fix Extreme from 21 Day Fix Extreme.  It was a lot of fun, and most definitely a workout to do with shoes (I usually workout barefoot).  You spend the whole workout in the resistance band.  You also spend most of the workout on the floor.  It was a good resistance workout, and I like Autumn.  I mean, she's no Shaun T...but she's comfortably in second (or third if you count Jillian).  I'm just going through the rest of the week with the program, and we are going to officially start the program on Monday.

I'm excited going forward to see what results come from this.  My goal is to be in the 230's when I go see my doctor...that will be the least I have weighed in a LONG time.  Follow me on IG @themeproject3, and leave comments with your favorite workout this week!!

Monday, April 25, 2016

Motivation Monday: People who Inspire Me

I will be honest, it has been incredibly difficult for me to get motivated.  I feel like I'm stuck in a rut, and I can't seem to muster up enough motivation to lay down the kitty litter to get the car out of the ditch.  I think I have tried and not succeeded so many times that I don't know what Im' doing wrong and thing that I am just spinning my wheels.  

I think the most important thing has been others.  I know I do much MUCH better when my wife is on board.  Also, I know it is easier when I am connected to others, such as going to Zumba, participating in support groups.  The key is to participate in these groups.  You only get out of them what you put in, and I have not always put in a lot.  I need to work on using the group when I am struggling.  

I have been following Laura Dalpini on IG.  I first heard her story on Shaun T's podcast.  In a nutshell, she was going nowhere fast in Wichita, KS and decided to leave and couch surf across the United States.  she ended up going south then up to New York.  While in New York, she randomly auditioned for the CIZE test group and made it.  She became a Beachbody coach and is spreading the word of being th best you.  What connects me to her is she and I share similar stories.  We have similar starting weights, she is strong in her Faith and I am trying to find it, and we both want to inspire others with our stories.  The difference is she has the "guts," and I am trying to find mine.  That's who I want to be at the end of my journey...skinny, confident, taking risks, and strong in my mind and in my Faith.  Follow her on Instagram @lauradalpini.  She's amazing.

Shaun T is another motivator of mine.  I love his workouts (even though some of them are hard).  He is always pushing the envelope and coming up with new and different things.  Cize is my favorite, just because I LOVE to dance, but I'm a fan of Focus T25 and Insanity.  He is incredibly motivating and makes you believe you can do it, no matter your fitness level.  There is no shame in taking a break or getting moves wrong.  His workouts are my favorite...even over Jillian Michaels.  And, everyone knows I'm a big Jillian Michaels fan.  

The other thing that is motivating me is my doctor's appointment in a month.  She knows I'm on this weight loss journey, and I have not seen her in a while.  I asked for a refill on some medication, and she called and said she wants to see me.  So, I want to weigh less than when I saw her a while ago.  Now, I'm on a mission.  Hopefully that will help me develop some good habits that will continue beyond my doctor's appointment.  Until then, my doctor's appointment will have to be enough. 

Sunday, April 24, 2016

Soulful Sunday: Who Is Jesus

Part of my journey to becoming the best me is developing my spiritual side.  In order to do this, I go to Bible study every Tuesday with a few friends, and I am reading a book called Rediscovering Jesus: An Invitation.  I am going to put all of my reflections for the week into one post so I don't overwhelm everyone with spiritual posts.  

In bible study, we are reading the Book of Ruth.  We only read one chapter at a time, and this week was week one.  It is interesting to read about a woman who is so devoted to her family that she, despite pleas to do otherwise, stayed with her mother and law and sacrificed her changes of finding a husband and settling down herself.  As my wife and I are in the middle of making decisions about employment, moving, and ultimately where we want to be, I think there is a take away lesson for me to be less selfish and to think about the needs of my wife as well.  She was recently offered a good offer that would require her to move away and us to be apart for a while.  She turned it down.  As much as I believe that is what is best for her (she is in the middle of a doctorate) and for us (I just started my new job), I feel a lot of guilt.  We talked about it, and my wife agrees this is what is best, does not think it would be good for her or for the new institution; however, I still feel a little guilty.  Throughout this process, I have had such a difficult time letting God take control and trusting that things will workout exactly the way they are supposed to.  That's the challenge, which is why I know I need to work on learning about and allowing Jesus into my life. 

The book, Rediscovering Jesus, reads like a devotional.  It is divided into short chapters, and I read a chapter each night.  It has been an introduction to Jesus and his teachings.  It discusses the "Jesus question," which is "who do you say that Jesus is?" The author of the book surmises that Jesus is an invitation to know God.  I think this is an interesting, and accurate, way to conceptualize God.  When I think of my answer to the Jesus question, I think I would have answered this question very literally such as "the son of God" and "someone who taught God's word and died for our sins."  Now, I'm in the process on getting to know, and truly relying on, God and getting to know God through Jesus.  That's what I'm trying to determine and to discover and to rely on.  

Saturday, April 23, 2016


Today is the day I put my "stats," or my weight and measurements out there to be able to track my progress through the journey.  I didn't do this last week, so this is my first week, which is probably for the best because I did not do so well this week.  I worked out four out of five days, and I only did Max 30 twice.  My wife and I talked about it and decided Max 30 probably isn't the best program to start with, so we bought 21 Day Fix Extreme and Focus T25.  I think she would be happy with just cardio, but I need some strength training too!  I wanna get toned.  The new programs should be here Tuesday, so I am just going to plan to exercise next week and get started on a program the first week of May.

To know how far you've gone, you have to know where you started.  So, here are the starting stats.

Weight: 259.7 lbs.
Bust: 45.5 inches
Waist: 40 inches
Hips: 54 inches
Thigh: 29.5 inches
Arm: 16 inches

Now that I have gone to Zumba, walked the dogs, and ran errands for my wife, I am going to go soak in a bathtub with some detox (which I'm hoping to make a weekly habit) before I go to my moms lake house for a cookout.

Here's to progress and continually improving upon myself!

Wednesday, April 20, 2016

Workout Wednesday: The Insanity Begins

Good Evening!

I know this post is coming super late, but at least I am posting.  That's progress for me.  This week has been super hard for some reason, even though I feel like I've started with smaller goals.  my only two goals were to not eat fast food and complete the first week of Insanity: Max 30.  So, I thought I would reflect on my week so far...

Day 1: I could not get my ass out of bed (you'll notice this is a theme throughout the week).  So, I committed to working out after work...AND I DID!  That's pretty good for me.  I thought I worked out pretty hard, and I was okay with myself.  However, today I don't think that I pushed to my max.  I did the plyo as long as I could and then did the modification.  Even with this strategy, I maxed out at minute 4.  I'm not very happy about that, but I guess there's no where to go but up, right?  My food was also pretty on point this day as well.  I had a shake, a health choice frozen meal, and grilled chicken with veggies.

Day 2: I still could not get my ass out of bed.  However, unlike the previous day, I couldn't work out after work.  Instead, I ate pizza hut with my wife (I had the veggie one, but I had a lot of it) and then went to Bible study.  I did have a salad for lunch though.  The one thing I was kind of disappointed with was that I wasn't sore.  That makes me think I didn't dig as deep as I could have (or I have awesome vitamins, but I'm pretty sure it's the latter).  Bible study was nice though.  We started the Book of Ruth.

Day 3 (TODAY!): Today was a combination of day 1 and 2.  I couldn't get my ass out of bed (who is surprised).  I DID workout after work today, and I pushed myself harder.  I reached my peak heart rate for 6 of the 30 minutes.  Those in and out abs and squat lunges killed me though.  I ate the rest of my pizza for lunch, a salad for dinner...then my wife showed me her secret stash of ice cream sandwich cookies.  UGH....

Tomorrow, I'm going to get my ass out of bed.  I am going with my supervisor to a meeting tomorrow, so Im not sure what eating will look like.  If anything, I'm starting to make better choices and am holding myself more accountable than I have previously.  We will see how this progresses.

For daily updates, check out my instagram at themeproject3

Sunday, April 17, 2016

First Steps

This is, what feels like, the millionth time I've tried to "start" my journey to being a "better me."  Furthermore, this is the twelfth millionth time I've tried to blog about it.  My name is Lauren; I'm about 120lbs overweight; I am an emotional eater; I can't seem to break the cycle.  I have enough insight to know I need some kind of accountability.  Therefore, I've created this blog, an Instagram account, and am on a couple of accountability groups on Facebook.

Really, I need to get my shit together before I turn 30.  I want to be around for my wife, my family, and my friends.  I want to be the best me possible; I don't want to be self-conscious anymore.  This means I need to exercise, eat better, and work on me, hence "the me project."

So, I'm committing to 30 days of Insanity: Max 30.  If I can make it 30 days, I can develop a habit.  Thirty days sounds attainable.  I plan to post on my accountability groups and on Instagram; therefore, "people" know that I am doing it and can hold me accountable (or ask questions) should I not post.  Along with this comes eating better.  I know if I plan out and prep my meals on the weekend, I will be successful.  Therefore, this is also part of the 30 day accountability plan.  In addition to social media, I plan on having segments on my blog called "Workout Wednesday" and "Foodie Friday;" that way, people can see what I think of exercising, what I'm eating, and have accountability for me.  Also, I want to do "STATurday" so I can track my progress.

Additionally, I'm attending Bible study on Tuesdays with a group of friends and am trying to get my soul taken care of as well.  So, I may post some reflections on what I'm doing as well in effort to sort out my thoughts.  Essentially, this blog is going to document my journey, my life.  It's going to give me somewhere to put all of the stuff that I don't feel like I can say to my friends.  I think that's a big part of the problem; my weight has been shamed for so long that I don't want to talk about it to anyone.  Therefore, I'm going to start with strangers; hopefully along the way I will become more courageous, make new friends, and grow stronger in my journey.

I'm the caterpillar; I want to change into the butterfly; the time is now.